My Mom, The Secret Drummer?

So angry! TokiDoki, Shasta Girl, and everyone else has been fucking with me for weeks. Acting like nothing was going on, when they were just slapping me in my face from behind my back.

Like I planned, I met with Aurora today.  She turned out looking 100% different from before, this time in distressed, Hot Topic approved gear, totally Lloyd Center punk, and her long blond hair put into a pony tail with cable ties.  So cute!

I brought my audio recorder, because I thought she had something important to tell me, and if she didn’t, I wanted to get an accurate record of her crazy talk to laugh at with TokiDoki (the fuck!).

Anyway, we went into Starbucks, and I bought her a hot chocolate to go with my green tea, and this is exactly what she said (thanks to my Narrative Engine doing the transcribing):

Aurora: First of all, stop fucking with me! My name is Aurora, and I’m totally not as eccentric as you made me out to be on your blog!
Miranda: Sorry! But I wasn’t the one dropping boxes and running through downtown!
Aurora: Second of all, all of that was a put on. It was a test, an initiation. Ai thought of it all – wanted to get a reaction out of you.
Miranda: Great! I’m so glad you thought of it all….
Aurora: No… “I” like in A-I. You know, Ai? She hasn’t contacted you already?
Miranda: Ai? Never heard of her. She’s Japanese?
Aurora: Shit! You mean you…. OK, let me jump back a bit. Have you been etched yet?
Miranda: Etched?
Aurora: Back even further. Did your mother tell you that…. ummmm….. did she mention that she was a drummer in punk bands when she was younger?
Miranda: Drummer? No way! Wait – how do you know my Mom?
Aurora: Fucking number 12….. Alright, let me set some ground rules here.
Miranda: Right! No crazy talk is number one, and you’re already stomping that into the dirt.
Aurora: Number one – your life is full of crazy talk and you don’t even know it. I’m only going to be in town for another week, and I have very specific instructions about what I can tell you, and what I can’t mention at all.
Miranda: Instructions? You mean someone told you to follow me?
Aurora: Number two – I can tell you the truth about some things, but other things I can’t mention at all. I can tell you that yes, Ai told me to follow you.
Miranda: I need something stronger than green tea, stat!
Aurora: Number three – you can ask me any questions you want, but I can only answer some of them.
Miranda: OK, so question one – who the fuck are you again?
Aurora: See, that’s the problem! You totally should know who I am, but you don’t. Your mother has been disconnected for so long that she’s forsaken all responsibility.
Miranda: Who. The fuck. Are you!
Aurora: I’m your Dustdevil Darling… I like that a lot.
Miranda: Serious!
Aurora: So. I really am Aurora, and I currently live in Mt. Shasta. That’s the city next to the mountain, and not inside the fucking mountain!
Miranda: Ah, clarity….
Aurora: Working backwards. I’ve been in Portland since the beginning of the year, studying you. Ai ordered me to do this. Ai is the leader of…. eh, rule number two is hard to work around. Let me try another way. Ai is a girl, about our age. She lives…… somewhere. Her mother is…… shit. This isn’t going well.
Miranda: You’re telling me!
Aurora: Ah! The bands. I can totally talk about the bands, at least. Your mother was, for a time, the drummer in the best band in the world, Suspender.
Miranda: Like your shirt?
Aurora: Totally like this shirt – I’m wearing it because I thought you would recognize it. You don’t?
Miranda: No….. I know my Mom is into music wholesale, but I didn’t know she was in a real band.
Aurora: Your brother Joey might have vague memories, but he was tiny the last time the bands played. Since you were born after the Big Break Up, you wouldn’t know about Suspender unless your mother did her job and told you.
Miranda: OK OK! I’m trying hard to work with you. The only thing you’ve said so far that seems even remotely real is that my mother was in a band. Tell me about that – that’s bound to be something I can verify on Google.
Aurora: Well….. maybe not. She always used an alias – 8-Track. Anyway, let me continue with other things you definitely know about. Circle X?
Miranda: Sure – Tokie works there.
Aurora: Phone? Brian Thomas?
Miranda: Yeah! He’s the one that attacked Die Database – Kaia’s ex.
Aurora: Good. So your mother, Circle X, Phone and Suspender are all related.
Miranda: Related?
Aurora: Rule Number Three. I really wish I could tell you, but you’re going to find out soon enough. I would be so much easier if number 12 – your mother – did what she was supposed to do in the first place.
Miranda: Number 12?
Aurora: I’m sorry – I can’t even go there right now. I’ll have to check with Ai to see if it’s allowed.
Miranda: I am so very much lost and frustrated. Didn’t you want to meet me because you had the hots for me? Isn’t that why you were following me?
Aurora: If I didn’t know what everyone else but you knows, I’d be all over you right now. You’re totally off limits, even to Tokie.
Miranda: Why do you keep mentioning Tokie? Unless….. fuck! She set me up!
Aurora: Yes…. you weren’t supposed to notice, but she’s been as subtle as a runaway train. Tokie has been helping me track you down for observation.
Miranda: Right now, I’m killing her!
Aurora: No no – it’s not her fault. Technically she’s not family, but Ai has given her special status. She’s there to look out for you, like we all are.
Miranda: Here’s the deal. I will give you 5 more minutes. Give me a speech, notes on a napkin, charades, whatever it takes. Make me want to stay here and listen to you, or I’m gone.
Aurora: OK. Let me think…. alright. I’m going to tell you my life story. You won’t understand part of it now, but that’s OK. My father was a guitarist in Suspender – Velcro is what he went by. My mother is Susan Richardson, drummer from a whole lot of bands – Eskimo Guy, Slow Cone, Fire Escape, Jumpster and Photocop. I was born a few months before you, in 1995 – the year after all of the bands broke up. If you’re not getting the picture, my parents and your mother were best friends, at least back then. Phone, Kaia’s boyfriend, grew up with them. You with me so far?
Miranda: Yeah, actually. Go on…
Aurora: In total, there were 13 people from separate bands that got together before we were born, and….. well…… let me back track a bit. I mentioned Ai – she’s another girl born from some band members. She, like me, was raised in a very special way, home schooled and trained for a very specific purpose. Our parents were involved in something, something that seemed like a great idea at the time, but turned out to be awful. Pure Land Antennas, right? So, they trained us, their children, to make up for their mistakes. Everyone kept their end of the bargain, except 8-Track – the 12th and final member of the core Collective.
Miranda: Pure Land Antenna – Kaia won’t tell me what that means. And the Collective?
Aurora: Ai definitely will not allow me to say anything more about that. Especially before your 16th birthday. March 31st, right?
Miranda: Yeah. Wait, what? How are you knowing all this about me?
Aurora: Well….. let’s just say that everyone in the Collective thinks that you’re important. Number 12 didn’t believe them, and so she split off, went permanently off line, and moved up here with you and your brother. She totally threw out the plan, didn’t home school you, didn’t train you properly, and apparently has been spending your inheritance like there’s no tomorrow.
Miranda: Inheritance? What the fuck?
Aurora: We’re at that point where I just can’t say any more, except…… you’ve at least heard of antizine, right? She didn’t keep that from you, too?
Miranda: Anti-zine rights?
Aurora: Oh, we’re all fucked. I don’t care what Ai does to me, I’m going to give it to you straight. Miranda, you are in so much trouble that you wouldn’t believe it. We all know what’s supposed to happen to you – we knew it before you were born – and the only one that can help is suffering a fate worse than death. I’m not the only one following you, and in a few months, you’re going to look back on this conversation and hate me, even thought I’m trying so hard to help.
Miranda: That’s your straight talk?
Aurora: Fine. Listen – we literally know what’s going to happen to you. Not all the future details, just the end results.  You’re in amazing danger, and we don’t see any way to change that. At this point, telling you the details would only make things worse – it’s always listening. Like I said, your life is built upon crazy talk you’ve never heard until now – you’ve been hidden from the truth that stalks you, that’s after us all. It’s all going to start in a few weeks, and I won’t be there to help – I can’t be. By the time I get back to Portland, it will be too late. You’re totally unprepared. I really wish I had better news to tell you.
Miranda: But you haven’t told me shit! You’re choking me to death with your maybes and might haves.
Aurora: Enough! I can’t take any more of this…. Miranda! Fucking listen to me, you are the chosen light! I know you don’t even know what that means, and I can’t tell you, but it’s nothing I’d ever wish on anyone. Ai, Tokie, Kaia and I are going to try to help, but we can’t do it alone. You need to understand your hidden history, and fast, before there’s nothing left.
Miranda: I’m gone. I don’t care if you look like an elf or a glitter punk, you’re half-truths and outright delusions are really killing your cuteness.
Aurora: I wish I….. please, just transcribe this tape and share it with someone. We all want to help you, while we still can.
Miranda: Sincerely, yours truly, bye.

Then I left, angry and frustrated, and came right home.  Problem is, I can’t even look my Mom in the eye any more – not because of Aurora’s insane story, but because of the most believable part, that she was in a cool band before I was born.  Isn’t that the sort of thing you’d tell your teenage daughter, you know, to help win her over to your side?  Now, do I just go right out and ask her?  What if she reads this, will she approach me about it?

My mind is all throbbing and wheezing now – too much to process.

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This entry was posted in Aurora, I don't believe it!, Shasta Girl, Suspender. Bookmark the permalink.

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